A Personal Letter to Disney: Be Brave

by Mary Lou Quinlan
Published May 14, 2013 in Kids, Media

There is a storm brewing with the Disney release of a toy line featuring its first truly ‘brave’ heroine, Princess Merida. Seems that in an effort to appeal traditionally to little girls’ doll tastes, the rough and tumble star of “Brave” has lost weight, filled out her too tight gown and adopted that doe-eyed sparkle princess look….the look and the life that the animated Merida despised.

I will let anthropologists and psychologists dissect why this is right or wrong. Or just cowardly.

I will turn instead to my own experience, watching the animated film alongside a 7 year old redhead named Soleil.  From the moment that Merida, the cartoon ginger wild child, picked up her bow and galloped through the woods, Soleil’s heart pounded in the saddle alongside her heroine. Proud, cheering, valiant.

For once, the story wasn’t about a cookie-cutter forgotten waif lifted by a prince to a palace. This was true grit, the kind of beauty any girl with guts can achieve. The knowing eyes, the powerful stance, the in-your-face joy of being a girl alive in her own skin spoke to Soleil. And the hair, the untamed, boundless curls that said, “Remember me!” Go ahead, Disney, give our real ‘brave’ Merida a sparkly crown. We need her in the Magic Kingdom. But don’t mess with her curls or her curves or her courage.

Tags: Advertising, Disney, Ego Protection, For Women, Good Intentions, Just Ask a Woman, Marketing to Women, marketing with women in mind, Mary Lou Quinlan, Psychology, Retail, Shopping, Whole Truths, women, working moms

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Just Ask Y: Thank you for being critical.

by Chelsea Castner
Published April 18, 2013 in New Ideas, Work

Tags: For Women, Gen Y, generation y, Marketing to Women, marketing with women in mind, Mary Lou Quinlan, Positive thoughts, Positivity, Psychology, Self-help, Whole Truths, Working Mother

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Making a big leap after 40?

by Mary Lou Quinlan
Published March 27, 2013 in Work

Got a career dream waiting in your pocket? Most of us do. In 1998, I took a big step to achieve mine and Just Ask a Woman was the result. And the dreams keep growing. Hope you enjoy this piece published today on LearnVest, the fantastic financial support site for young women. Read it HERE!

Tags: Advertising, Careers, For Women, Half Truth, marketing with women in mind, Mary Lou Quinlan, Psychology, The God Box, The New York Times Best seller, Whole Truths, women

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Weighing in on Leaning In and Sheryl Sandberg

by Mary Lou Quinlan
Published February 26, 2013 in Education

The news of Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg’s new book “Lean In” hit the front page of The New York Times this week. But how will it affect the way women, especially younger women look at work? My blog on today’s Huffington Post gives my two cents. Enjoy, comment, like, disagree…whatever. Love to hear from you! Or leave a comment on Huff Po!

Tags: "Lean In", Advertising, Customer Service, Ego Protection, Facebook, For Women, huffington post, Marketing to Women, marketing with women in mind, Mary Lou Quinlan, Psychology, Sheryl Sandberg, Whole Truths

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5 Reasons Women Talk More than Men

by Mary Lou Quinlan
Published February 21, 2013 in News

On TODAY today, Andrea Canning hosted a segment about why women talk more than men, see it here. New research indicates that women may actually over-index on a brain protein linked to language, called FOXP2.

Of course, the piece concluded with lots of irate husbands on the street complaining that their wives never shut up and in-studio banter about who talks more and ‘Chatty Cathy’ defense. After listening to thousands of women–especially my besties–talk over the years, I know they talk more than most men. (I sure do!)

I have used the ‘women talk 20,000 words to men’s 7,000 words’ stat but never knew about the protein rationale. Here are my five unscientific reasons why women talk more:

1. They notice more and therefore, have more content to share. And they want you to know it.

2. As a gender that feels unlistened to, they figure, if I just talk more, something has to get through!

3. They like to tell stories and provide context rather than just ‘get to the point’ as they are so often (annoyingly) told to do.

4. Talking is therapy and connection. By talking, I am soothing, sharing, being alive with you. Silence is often a signal that something is wrong. Unless it’s during savasana, which means, ahh.

5. If they are like me, talking is a way to fill in the sentences that others leave unfinished. Because others don’t talk fast enough. And we know what they are going to say anyway!

The good news for marketers is that women are the talking gender AND the buying gender. Silent types can’t help you figure out your marketing problems. Talkers can. A person of few words, like “Me, too!” isn’t a great help to you. A talker is, and your best talkers are….women.

Tags: Customer Service, Ego Protection, For Women, Half Truth, Marketing to Women, marketing with women in mind, Mary Lou Quinlan, Psychology, speaking to women, Television, The Today Show, Whole Truths, women

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Just Ask Y: To meet your dreams, count cash (not sheep!)

by Chelsea Castner
Published February 8, 2013 in Money

Ever since I wrote my blog “Money, it’s worth the relationship,” my antenna has been tuned into articles and posts about finances.  I came across this fabulous list of tips posted on DailyFinance, titled “13 Money Lies You Should Stop Telling Yourself by Age 30.”

I want to highlight for you three facts that made my jaw drop. Hopefully they will get you to pump up the romance in your financial relationship this Valentine’s Day.

Fact 1: A person who starts investing at age 25 will only have to save $4,830 annually to reach $1 million by age 65.

If your first thought was—well I’m not 25, so I don’t need to start yet. WRONG ATTITUDE. Or if you said to yourself—there is no way I can save that much annually. WRONG, again. This statistic isn’t just to encourage the well-off 25 year olds to save. It’s to emphasize that starting today, at whatever age, income level or situation you’re in, is enough if you want to fulfill your dreams.  Just because you aren’t making six figures today, you shouldn’t discount your future.

Fact 2: It’s been proven that a larger salary does not make you happier.

How many times have you heard or said—if I had more money I would do the things I really enjoy doing. I hate to break it to you, but that’s probably not going to happen. Yes, money gives you freedom to indulge in the finer things, but fun doesn’t always come with a price tag (we’ve all seen enough MasterCard commercials to know that the best moments are priceless). If you aren’t having fun now, by the time you’re making more money, you will probably forget what fun even means to you.

If you’re not planning time on your calendar for things you find enjoyable, your current relationships are going to suffer. And if you start presenting yourself as the, “I don’t have enough money to have fun” person, you probably won’t be making any new friends either.  So instead of declining invites due to your bank account, get creative and start inviting friends to things that do fit into your budget. To get you started, check out my video blog here. I share my favorite app that instantly gets you 50% off at restaurants.

Fact 3: It cost roughly $240,000 to raise a child in the U.S, and this figure does not include college tuition. 

Once you get over the shock of this number, take a moment and say (verbally, electronically or even silently) thank you to your folks. I’m not sharing this information to encourage you to take out a sharpie marker and cross “Mother” off your future goals.  Hopefully the opposite is true. If you’re so passionate about becoming a parent you will start taking action today.  That might mean opening up a savings account, asking for the raise you deserve or how about starting a side business built on your interests and passions.

Money is waiting for you. Be bold. Be creative. Be proactive. It’s up to you to reach out and take it.

Tags: For Women, Gen Y, generation y, Good Intentions, Marketing to Women, marketing with women in mind, Psychology, Whole Truths

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Just Ask Y: Diverse means diverse

by Chelsea Castner
Published January 28, 2013 in Beauty

Foundation used to be just liquid, cream or powder. Now it’s primer, tinted moisturizer, BB Crème, mineral makeup, refiner, mattifier, bronzer. When will the makeup madness end?!

It’s no wonder our makeup bags can’t zip and our bathroom drawers are jammed with tubes and sticks. Women are constantly struggling to find a product that works for their skin color and type, always hoping the newest formula will solve their problems. It’s no wonder women spend over $7 billion a year on cosmetics!

Gen Y’s relationship to foundation generally falls into 3 categories:

• I have my go-to products and I’m never changing.
• I’m skipping foundation and pretending that my natural color is, well, naturally perfect.
• I will try any product out there because I haven’t found my perfect fit yet.

I happen to be in the last category. I am shameless sample addict. I even tear out the makeup samples in magazines.

Yesterday I attended “Goddess on The Go”, an all day workshop to inspire women to reconnect to themselves. We all really stink at managing our busy lives, and typically the first thing to fall off our to-do list is “take care of me.”  The day was packed with inspiring women speaking about on the importance of body, nutrition, spirituality and finances, all mixed together with sexy fun.

Iman Cosmetics was one of the event sponsors and had a table of product samples. Despite my love for a good makeup sample, I didn’t immediately approach the table. I let my narrow-minded thought—”Oh I don’t know if they would have a shade for me,” keep me at bay. At the end of the day I was given a second chance to prove myself wrong and approach the table. Although I was doubtful there was a shade to match my winter white complexion, Melanie, the representative, handed me two samples of their BB Crème in Sand Light (I can’t think of a paler color description than that!) and I was on my way.

I took the first opportunity I could to test the sample. So, this morning instead of choosing my other BB Crème or two different tinted moisturizers, I gave Iman a shot. I couldn’t be happier with the results. My skin looks even and covered (the winter redness is diminished), my face feels moisturized and brightened, and I don’t have that heavy, sticky feeling.

I’ve worked with and for large mass consumer makeup companies, and know a lot of women feel ignored by color cosmetics that don’t address their unique beauty.  Iman Cosmetics created a collection that aims to fit all woman, every color and skincare need. They aren’t solving just one demographic’s problem. Skin diversity ranges from light to dark, oily to dry, sensitive to ….well, I think we all claim our skin is sensitive. Iman Cosmetics isn’t just concealing a problem. It’s solving an issue at its core— providing a line where every woman can find a product that lets her unique self shine.

If you haven’t found a product that fits you, keep searching. There are enough makeup brands out there so you don’t have to settle for good, because when it comes to makeup, good isn’t good enough. A great foundation gets you one step closer to unleashing your (natural!) inner goddess!

Tags: Beauty, Cosmetics, For Women, Gen Y, generation y, Half Truth, Iman Cosmetics, Makeup, Marketing to Women, marketing with women in mind, Psychology, Whole Truths

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Just Ask Y: The Roadmap to Accomplished Resolutions

by Chelsea Castner
Published January 15, 2013 in Education, Health

It’s officially two weeks into 2013. As energy and excitement of the New Year wears off, it’s easy to fall off the “I can do it” wagon and back on the familiar path of old habits.

I want to share new research I came across that makes sticking to resolutions even more difficult: According to the Medical Research Council, it takes 66 days to form a new habit. This means we all have another 7 weeks left to keep the positive mojo going.

I must admit, I feel a little duped that I believed the “21 days to break your habit” crap. I guess 3 weeks of acting like an angel, not drinking coffee and working out every day, isn’t enough time to actually grow a set of wings.

In reading blogs, articles and listening to my friends, I’ve gathered that Gen Y women are putting a huge amount of pressure on themselves to make big changes in 2013. Maybe it’s because the world didn’t end and they see this as an opportunity at a second chance at life. Or, more likely, it’s because they are proud of their educations, aware the world needs positive changes and know how to utilize technology to make it happen.

Do a little research and you’ll find that the words passion and determination are how Gen Y-ers are best described—two things our world desperately needs. I want to encourage Gen Y women to keep striving to achieve their resolutions. The 66 day timeline shouldn’t derail them from coming into their deserved greatness.

Here are some tips that have helped me stay on the wagon every day:

Dream big to be big, but the biggest impact can come from the smallest acts.

• If I’m frustrated I’m not getting to my end goal fast enough, it’s easy for me to give up. What I do now is reassure myself when I wake up that I have the whole day to make one, small proactive step towards my target. Doesn’t that sound attainable? With just one step forward you gain a huge amount of momentum to attack the next day.

Fine-tune your resolution list.

• If your goals for the year fill an entire notebook page that’s awesome, but take out a marker and circle your top 3 (I suggest the ones that seem the most daunting, because they’re probably the ones you are most passionate about). Now everyday remind yourself of them (with a phone alert, an event on the calendar or anywhere you know you will see it). When you start making your big goals happen, you generate a lot of positive energy that carries over to other areas of your life. For example, if you have a productive day creating a personal website, you’ll probably be so amped up about it that a great workout is just what you’re craving.

Talk a big game,  and then walk a big game.

• When you tell someone you’re doing something you instantly feel accountable to make it happen. That’s a good thing, so use it as leverage to reach your goals. This year I told different people my resolutions for 2013, big and small. My one roommate knows that I am trying to find my inner Zen, so she invites me to go to Yoga and Pilates all the time; and my boss knows I have big dreams for Just Ask Y so she’s always curious what my next post is going to be about.  Start spilling your secrets to the people you know will keep you honest about them.

If you have more tips and tricks that have helped to keep you on track please share them below! We all could use an extra dose of inspiration. And try to remind yourself to not focus so much on day 66, because today is the day that counts.

Tags: 2013, Advertising, For Women, Gen Y, generation y, Good Intentions, New Years Resolution, Psychology, Social Networking, Whole Truths

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Just Ask Y: Looking for the one way road out of crazy dating

by Chelsea Castner
Published January 14, 2013 in Relationships

How come it’s so hard to meet a normal guy in this city?  

If we have a mutual friend on Facebook then I can message him, right?

If he doesn’t text me before 11 PM then I’m deleting his number from my phonebook.  

I see on Instagram he’s at Bounce, maybe I should just show up? (…What? Omg, this is such a coincidence!?!)

Okay I know how that sounds: single, young women are crazy! But give me a moment to defend Gen Y women and why they think this way; and if you’re a Gen Y woman, I’ll be giving you some of my own advice.

The dating world today is more confusing than for any generation before. Friends are no longer going to the ice cream parlor to flirt by the jukebox while sipping on a root beer float (there goes meeting the next Danny Zucco). And when was the last time anyone was invited to a party at a friend’s fabulous Soho loft with single artists and musicians (thank Carrie Bradshaw for creating that impossible perception of NYC dating life)?

Yesterday, The New York Times style section had a great article titled The End of Courtship.  Although, I don’t believe that courtship has vanished. It just resurrected itself in a new form, adapted to the changing times. A man coming to the door with a bouquet of flowers before dining with you at his favorite restaurant is probably not a reality for many Gen Y women. However, “have a good day” from the guy in line behind you at Starbucks can be!

Here’s my two cents for Gen Y women stuck in dating crazytown (I’m slowly relocating myself from here as well). Women need to stop beating themselves up over what their dating life looks like, or rather doesn’t look like. Comparing your present situation to movies, friends or what you’ve heard from previous generations, only keeps you stuck in the place of “why not me?” When women start this mental pity party, the floodgates open to crazy, irrational thoughts: “He probably didn’t ask for my number because…. I was having a fat day/I don’t know the difference between an inning and a quarter/my hair wasn’t straightened.”

If women shift their expectations on how they will meet a man they can open themselves up to more opportunities. Even a smile on the subway is a great start; a woman would feel pretty darn great about herself walking into work at 9AM already having a modern day courtship experience.

By no means should women lower expectations in the qualities a man should possess (I have polite, respectful and genuine chiseled in stone on my manly must-have list). What needs to change is the pressure women put on themselves to be approached in situations that rarely exist.

So ladies, take a moment and tell yourself: my thoughts are not crazy, they are just confused and out of date. What is crazy is acting on those confused thoughts. So please refrain from intense social media stalking and tipsy text messaging!

There is a ton more I want to share about dating as a Gen Y woman. Mostly from my own personal experience as a single lady, but I’m also hitting the streets and networking online to hear from other women who are looking for “love in a hopeless place.” So blast some tunes from our girl Rihanna and vow to stop thinking you’re crazy.

Tags: Dating, Ego Protection, For Women, Gen Y, Good Intentions, Half Truth, Just Ask a Woman, Just Ask Y, Marketing to Women, marketing with women in mind, Millennials, New York Times, Psychology, Relationships, Whole Truths

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Just Ask a Woman Introduces Just Ask Y: A Gen Y Think Tank

by Chelsea Castner
Published January 10, 2013 in New Ideas

Hi, I’m Chelsea Castner! As a brand planner, I came to Just Ask A Woman full of passion to help companies better understand and listen to women. And I mean really listening, by getting past Half Truths and automatic responses of “Oh, I’m fine.”  The most successful products and services are those built on women’s Whole Truths. But my insights and ideas come with the Gen Y point of view.

I have always been one to ask my peers why, why, why, because a question needs more than an answer. It deserves a story. Today’s young women have a lot of stories to tell, so with Just Ask Y I plan to help their voices be heard loud and clear.

Generation Y is full of powerful women who are paving the way into the future with exciting careers, energetic lifestyles and virtual relationships. Gen Y women have a huge appetite to know the answers to all their why’s. This generation is proving to the world that if you want it, you CAN have your all.

As you know, trends are constantly changing and “you’re either in or you’re out” (hopefully you read that in your best Heidi Klum voice). Gen Y women are changing the world we live in, and Just Ask Y is right on board with their forward thinking perspective. Why are they watching so many shows with dancing and singing? Why are they drinking that green pulpy goo they call juice? Why are they taking a pole dancing class at the gym? You want to know why, so Just Ask Y. Are you ready to hear the truth? ….Well, ready or not I’m going to give it to you straight up, shaken and heck maybe I’ll even give it a little stir!

I’ll be sharing new research that impacts Gen Y, interviews with leading edge Y folks that are emerging into the spotlight and I’ll even report on my own personal experiences as I go out and tackle some of the latest trends (hope you’re ready to get to know me real well). And when I have something really juicy to share with you, I’ll upload a video blog so you can see and hear my excitement. This will be content that will help you be more connected to young women in your market and life, (maybe even the one who’s sitting in the cubicle next to you right now.) Even if your takeaway is great party convo, that’s cool too.

Post your questions and comments below. I’ll be sure to give to give you honest answers to all your why’s. Stay tuned, there’s lots of great content to come…

Tags: Advertising, Bloggers, For Women, generation y, Half Truth, Just Ask a Woman, Just Ask Y, Marketing to Women, marketing with women in mind, Mary Lou Quinlan, New Business, New Trends, Social Networking, Trending, Whole Truths, women

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