Just Ask Y: The Door to My Heart
When I talk about my heart, I picture it as a big child-drawn outline, colored in red with a front door on it. Why a door? I need a way to control the love that I allow in and out, and I want to make sure the existing love is tucked safe inside.
We all control the door to our heart. At times we choose to open it just a crack for people we’re wary of, bolt it shut to avoid hurt or open it wide for an amazing person to walk into our lives.
When I learned my brother Allen and his wife Allison were expecting, my mind didn’t even get the chance to process that I would be adding “aunt” to my resume, but my heart knew.
I raced home once I heard it was go time and joined both families as a sideline cheerleader in the waiting room. A tiny baby was about to turn two men into grandfathers, two women into grandmothers, three men into uncles and me into an aunt. One single heartbeat was about to change us all.
Seeing hour-old Nathan Allen Castner for the first time caused my heart’s door to blow off its hinges. I didn’t realize that becoming an aunt would require me to make so much room in my heart for the tiniest person to fill.
I’ve quickly learned that my role as an aunt is to share, support and work my butt off to show Nathan just how much I love him.
I haven’t been an aunt for long, but these are the things I love about it so far…
- I get to make my own rules, guidelines and expectations for the type of aunt I will become.
- His head smells amazing. But seriously, new baby smell is so much better than new car smell.
- I know that I have nothing to do with the cause of his tears. I simply hand him to mommy for food and daddy for diapers.
- Oh, and I get to pimp him out in outfits like this… (maybe I should be ashamed that I’m using him as my latest dating service, but I’m not)
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